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Mr. Monopoly to Replace Benjamin Franklin On $100 Bill

Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen announced a joint marketing campaign between Hasbro and the Treasury Department at a Sunday press conference in Washington: Mr. Monopoly will replace Benjamin Franklin on the $100 bill. “We need to come up with new and creative ways to engage the youth in using the dollar to prevent them from becoming interested in cryptocurrencies,” Yellen explained.

The Secretary’s qualifications were vouched for by her mother: “This is a great move. Janet learned everything she knows about money from playing Monopoly with me as a kid. Monopoly teaches individuals real life lessons.”

Federal Reserve Chair Jerome Powell saw a different upside, adding, “Very few people actually use the paper money anymore. This seems like a really good way to transition to CBDC’s.”

The new $100 bill begins circulating in June 2024. Hasbro is rumored to be working with the World Economic Forum to develop new designs for other state currencies.

The campaign is the second documented beat of the defense of the dollar, following the arrest of G. Edward Griffin four days earlier.

irl: Fabricated. No Hasbro–Treasury partnership exists; the Yellen and Powell quotes are invented. The joke — the dollar rebranding itself with the board-game mascot of monopoly money, while the Fed chair openly treats it as a CBDC on-ramp — writes itself. The article spells the company both “Hasboro” and “Hasbro”; the wiki standardizes on Hasbro.