Revision history · Character
Jason Williams
1 revision · first seen 2026-08-12 · last edited 2026-08-12 · 0 by Henry 1 by a human
- bugle-ingest[bot] 2026-08-12 Ingest: 0 new episode(s) — raw sources + transcripts 32a9a2b
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diff --git a/wiki/characters/jason-williams.md b/wiki/characters/jason-williams.md new file mode 100644 index 00000000..535d8cfa @@ -0,0 +1,61 @@ +--- +title: Jason Williams +type: character +portrait: /portraits/x-jason-williams.jpg +status: confirmed +sources: + - raw/episodes/1-year-anniversary-bugle-weekly-episode-52/bundle.json + - raw/episodes/we-know-whats-going-on-bugle-weekly-episode-54/bundle.json + - raw/episodes/in-the-midst-of-madness-bugle-weekly-episode-102/bundle.json +--- + +Jason Williams is a Bitcoin investor and author who appears in the Bugleverse +mostly as a reference point rather than a participant — a name the hosts reach +for when they need to illustrate a category. Across the record he occupies three +of them in turn: the shitcoiner, the self-declared OG, and the patriarch of a +scattered dynasty. He is never in the room. He is invoked in absentia. + +## The example of what not to get upset about + +His first documented appearance is as a cautionary illustration rather than a +subject. [[characters/richard-greaser|Richard Greaser]], restating what the +[[memes/40hpw|forty hours per week]] discipline is actually for, uses Williams' +inclusion in Maxi Madness as the model of misspent attention — the listener who +comes away from the podcast diet "extremely upset because Jason Williams is a +shit coiner."[^shitcoiner] The point is not that the charge is false. The point +is that being correct about it is not worth forty hours. + +> irl: Maxi Madness is the Bugle's bracket-style tournament bit; see +> [[storylines/maxi-madness]]. + +## Among the people claiming to be OG Bitcoiners + +Two weeks later Greaser opens an episode by naming Williams alongside American +HODL as "these people claiming to be OG Bitcoiners" — figures whose credentials +are stated rather than demonstrated, and who, by their own admission, "have no +idea what's going on."[^og-claimants] The framing is the premise of the episode +and of [[storylines/chartboi-punditry]]: the famous have conceded ignorance, and +the vacuum is what the Bugle claims to fill. Williams is cited here as evidence +of the vacuum, not as a commentator within it. The beat is recorded at medium +confidence; the quote spans two cues and the attribution rests on the ASR's +clean rendering of both names. + +## The bastard sons + +The record's last and strangest entry retcons Williams into a paterfamilias. Tim +B is introduced as "the third bastard Bitcoin son of going parabolic Jason +Williams"[^bastard-son] — placing him in the Bitcoins line as brother to +[[characters/teddy-bitcoins|Teddy Bitcoins]] and a Joey Bitcoins, with the +explanation that Tim shortened his name to distance himself from the family. The +epithet "going parabolic" attaches to Williams as a fixed honorific, which is +the joke: the man is identified by his forecast. + +Whether the Joey named here is +[[characters/joey-canadian-bitcoin|Joey Canadian Bitcoin]] is not settled. The +Bugle's "Bitcoins brothers" may be a family unit of their own invention, and the +surname is doing enough work in the bit that it need not point outward. Recorded +as uncertain; no page currently claims the connection. + +[^shitcoiner]: [[transcripts/1-year-anniversary-bugle-weekly-episode-52#t-1102|Bugle Weekly 52 @ 18:22]]. The sentence begins in the prior cue (t=1092): "the reason why we listen to forty hours of Bitcoin podcast a week isn't to get". +[^og-claimants]: [[transcripts/we-know-whats-going-on-bugle-weekly-episode-54#t-288|Bugle Weekly 54 @ 4:48]]. Quote spans two cues; the concession follows at t=291. American HODL has no page in the wiki and is left in plain text here. +[^bastard-son]: [[transcripts/in-the-midst-of-madness-bugle-weekly-episode-102#t-71|Bugle Weekly 102 @ 1:11]]. "Joey Bitcoins" is named at t=67.